Everything is better with a visual aid...

Some notes...

-This is a legitimate graph.
-Yes, I have a balks up. I'd be crazy not to.
-Apparently, Regina Spektor is a lesbian. Fuck that.
-Marrying some random person you don't know is a horrible idea. Why is that even an option?
-By "projected success", I mean a combination of how likely it is to happen and how happy it would make me. However, the equations and algorithms I used to deduce the particular combination are way too complex for common folk (such as yourself) to understand. I recommend picking which ever one makes you happier and sticking to that.
-This graph isn't just for the people mentioned in the graph. Also, if you haven't been included in this graph, maybe you should think about how to do a better job next time. Just saying.