Hot Fuss

That felt good. It's nice to be writing something I don't think is total horse shit.

I stayed up last night till about 7 writing a paper for my anthropology class. This class is absurd.

This is the prompt for our essay:

Tonal remembers you all the way back to your birth; nagual is the part of you that was never born and will never die, so it must have anticipated you beforehand, as it is doing now. You are already past the Eagle, but just cannot remember how or why, or what the fuss was all about. Tonal only thinks, and so can only think as if it were acting, that is its only beauty, purpose, or controlled folly in life. Put on your tonal costume and tell us, in precise language, what the fuss was all about.

Yeah. You're probably thinking "Oh, I don't know what tonal and nagual are or what it means to be past the Eagle". The problem is, neither do I. Or anyone else in the class. Apparently if we knew what those things meant, we "wouldn't have to take the class, nor is there any class that can teach what those things mean."

Whatever. If you don't want to not understand what's going on too much, just read the last paragraph. I suspect you can definitely appreciate the finale of my masterpiece.

Fuss?!

The fuss was simply about two things: the inability to define and the inability to use memory to remember. These two shortcomings, being intensities themselves, “frustrate” the essence of nagual creating yet another complexity. The word “define” itself creates immediate problems when trying to articulate the second reality and memory is the brains way of refusing to remember.

The tonal’s sole purpose of existence is to apply meaning to everything we see (and “see”). That means labeling, sorting, categorizing and packaging all our experiences into neat little bundles that our aunts would approve of and breaking them down into bite-size, understandable chunks. When isolated the tonal does just that, running smoothly and seamlessly to interpret our world. But when coupled with the nagual, both inherent and essential to the tonal, things lose their fluidity, their cool. When the tonal encounters nagual, it attempts to define it thereby confining it, transforming it into something reminiscent of the second reality but in truth is just a sham, much like a lengthy paper destroys points and locks meaning in a vowelled cage. This sham comes from the conflicting intensity of thought vs. feeling that says “the nagual by definition has no definition” creating a tonal barrier that prevents the brain from simply accepting the nagual, or “seeing” the first and second realities. The tonal is capable of comprehending the first and even the second reality, but cannot understand the two entwined as they are in totality. The first and second realities are essentially a yin and yang; two separate identities, both with inherent traits belonging to the opposite. Compound this with the yin and yang nature of tonal vs. nagual and you have one hell of a complex intensity. The fuss can be traced back in part to the simple act of attempting to define the indefinable.

Another folly tonal is often susceptive to is that of memory instead of remembering. A memory is not a recollection; rather it is a creation of ideas that often have nothing to do with the thing you are trying to remember. The nagual is immune to this because the nature of the nagual dictates that instead of having to remember things that happen, things often happen to be remembered (or more importantly, appreciated) and the nagual has already anticipated (and thus appreciated) them. Tonal however is not so lucky. If you base all interactions on false memories, than you’re building your house on the San Andreas Fault line. Recapitulation, though tedious, is the only surefire way to overcome the issue of memory and truly remembering their life exactly as it happened. By isolating yourself from the distractions of reality and focusing on the truth, you can see how truth and reality mesh to become something more than the intensities, something pure and unadulterated. Truth in remembrance is imperative to finding your way past the Eagle; you cannot find totality between nagual and false tonal no more than you can make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with peanut butter and catsup. Although recapitulation and “re-remembering” are essential to finding totality, they do not guarantee getting past the Eagle. The problem of memory plays a role in what the fuss is about.

In summary, all the fuss was about definition and remembrance. The humor (the joke, if you will) however is that neither of those issues hinder the nagual in any way. So in reality there was no fuss. The whole fuss was about the fact that there really was no fuss. The nagual, acknowledging the lack of fussiness becomes “frustrated” (I say frustrated for lack of a better word; the nagual would have anticipated this from the beginning and does not react so it could not be frustrated in reaction, it only behaves as though it reacts) by being hindered by the tonal and in turn hinders the tonal. The only difference from a common joke is that we can’t tell the difference and the inability to distinguish the cause and effect creates “thought about feeling” and “feeling about thought” complexities. The fuss was about “doing” to “not do” and vice versa, thinking about it to not think about it. The fuss was about everything and the fuss was about nothing and that’s what all the fuss was about.


Damn. I can't believe it. Firezer's actually has a poem in it. Respect.

At least it gave me an excuse to listen to an awesome CD.